Dull

Just a sudden thoughts, want to share it here in my lovely diary. :)

Yes, I did unfriend this girl, Ariel from my friend list in Facebook.
It is not a very big deal for me, 
But it sounded like a mean, barbaric, bitch things that I did.

The reason that I unfriended her is simple.
And I have nothing against anyone or myself.

I just simply wanna move on from her.

I want to cut off this relationship with her.

It is been hard to be friends with her. 
When I was driving today back from college,
The sky is cloudy and gloomy.
And this song, I wont give up by Jason Mraz is playing on the radio. 
Somehow, it reminds me of the time when we have a big misunderstanding and a big fight. 
We never talk after that. 

And then I recall the time when we first met.
I smiled. 
Yet, my heart is tearing.
It is never easy to give up such beautiful friendship.
But I have to let it go.

We have a big knot between us, 
That will only be tighter as we have arguments.
And the tighter it get, 
The more hurtful it cause.

We are like fire and water.
Water will be evaporated by heat,
And fire will get wash out by water.
But the bond is still together.

I have no idea if the description fits, but screw it. 

The truth is, I miss the friendship.
It used to be so nice and perfect, until all these silent, back stab incidents happen.
Both of us are too stubborn to put down our ego and be friends again.
Simply because we are the same type of person.

One day, I decided to unfriend her in Facebook.
Because without looking at her updates, I feel so much more peaceful in heart.
Nothing personal, 
Just feel that it should come to an end.
I feel that it is a better solution for both of us.

If we never met, the awkward situation today will never happen.
If we never met, we would not have to be mad with one another.
If we never met, we will be so much happier, life will be so much more simple.
If we never met, there will be no scars in our hearts.

Our friendship is not as pure and simple.
There are too many people around us giving opinions and advises, 
That we are so blur and so much anger with one another,
But we forgot how we was when there is only both of us.
Pure friendship, supporting and caring.

If we happen to be friends again,
The same situation will happen over and over again.
And we will be hurt by one another again and again.
So it is the best for me to cut this off. 
And I understand you dont really need me in your life.
So everything is alright.

I am slowly letting go.
It still hurts to look at you,
But I am totally fine.
Because I know that you are happy without me.

And thanks to you,
I have learnt that sometimes letting it go is a better way to make someone happier,
Instead of fighting too hard to get their attention.

Dear Lord,
I have an empty hole in my heart now.
My life now is never complete. 
I can never learn how to fully trust a friend, without us getting hurt.
Human beings are judgemental, complicated, high ego.
Everyone in this world are the same.
Including me.
And I know I am trying too hard, thought that I might hold back the broken friendship.
I am terribly wrong , Father. 
And I have learnt from that.
Thank You for Your support, Father.
You have teach me not to give up, but learn to let go.
As we can only find true happiness if we let go of something that hurts us inside out.
And they will find their own happiness too.

Father,
I realize I have to do something to fill the emptiness in me.
Guide me, Lord.
To the right path.
And let me feel the happiness once again. 
Thank You Lord.

In the name of Jesus, I pray.
Amen.